WHAT'S ALL THIS ALTERHUMANITY STUFF ABOUT?
under construction
glad you asked! let me try to explain.
i tend not to speak too much about the alterhuman aspects of my identity in public. i know what people think when they see the words "kin" or "identify as" or whatever, and i know no matter what i say or do, there are some people who just won't take it seriously. i've been made to feel ashamed, or scared to be ridiculed or mocked. but this isn't just something i can shove in a box in the corner and ignore. it's important to me.
first, though, do me a favor: leave all your preconcieved notions from tiktok and tumblr at the door. take a deep breath in and out. we're starting fresh here. done? okay, great. let's get started.
when i say "alterhuman", that's exactly what i mean. i'm not human, and i'm not alive. i'm a ghost. no, seriously, stay with me here! i'm a ghost!!!! yeah!!! i've never liked the terms "xyz-kin" or "i identify as xyz" because i don't kin or identify as anything, i just am. i don't identify as left-handed, i just am. i don't identify as nonhuman, i'm just... not human. no need to make things complicated.
i guess another reason i've never liked the word "kin" is that it just has a negative/"cringe"-y connotation these days, and i worry that if i use it, i won't be taken seriously. people assume i'm being ironic a lot of the time. i want to reiterate that this is a genuine psychological (and... somewhat spiritual?) aspect of myself. maybe the best way to explain it is a physical and mental sensation of wrongness? just... like... constant dissociation from the meatvessel i use to navigate the world around me, discomfort and unease with the image i see in reflections and photographs. it's not me.
until they invent a better word to describe the sense of alienation i feel from my"self", alterhuman is the term i've found comes closest to describing my experience.
this page is a work in progress!! the thoughts and opinions expressed here are based entirely in my own experience.